I went outside last night and there wasn’t a cloud in the sky. Suddenly I saw an alien space craft appear on the horizon. Then, without warning, this cloud formation appeared.
While all the airplanes are spraying toxic chemicals to kill us, they only do so in thin white lines, while this chemtrail is more like a chemmonster and will obviously kill a lot more people. One wonders who are these aliens who make these white monsters appear in the sky and why do they want to hurt me?
I took a sample of some water from my rain barrel the next day. Even though it hadn’t rained and the barrel was frozen over, I detected a thin scum of unknown origin. I’m contacting the Smithsonian to see if they would like to study it. I call it Chem-Skum and I’m convinced this is the key to the chemtrail mysteries.
While I was walking home, I bumped into Elvis, who remains in witness protection and he assured me we never landed on the moon and most of us are dead already from fall-out from Japan we just don’t realize we are zombies yet. And by the way, the Illuminati worship Aleister Crowley and the only reason Hollywood makes movies is so they can embed secret messages about how the Illuminati plan to kill us all before 2140. Why 2140? That’s the date the last bitcoin will be mined and the Illuminati plan to snatch all the coins after they kill off the world. I guess these alien cloud formations have something to do with that.
If you want to stop the world takeover or just send a message to Elvis, just contact me. I accept donations in bitcoin and will be happy to lead you around is circles if you believe any of this shit. And if you passed this on, without even getting to the end, well, that just proves you will believe just about anything, won’t you?