The Sermon on the Mount

When Jesus saw the crowds of people, he sat down and his followers came and gathered around him.

Everyone with two good ears, better listen! First, a shout-out to the to the homeless and hungry, the depressed, the distressed, the humble, the crumbled, the merciful and the pure in heart. But a special shout out to the peaceful. Blessed be those who are tortured and killed in the name of peace.

When you’re a peacemaker, they’ll insult and stab you in the back. They’ll lie and say nasty things about you just because you are peaceful. Be glad you are a peaceful because you will be rewarded in heaven. The powers-that-be always disrespect the true prophets. Same as it ever was.

You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its taste, it cannot be made salty again. Salt is useless if it loses its taste and will be discarded.

The power of your mind shines brighter than the sun in the invisible realms. Your mind is a citadel built on a high hill. So don’t hide your oil lamps, put them on the lamp stand.

Don’t think I have come to destroy the Law of Moses or the teaching of the prophets. I have come not to destroy their teachings but to give full meaning to them. Nothing will disappear from the law.

You have heard that it was said to our people long ago, ‘Thou shalt not murder.’ Any person who commits murder will be judged.’ But I tell thee, don’t even get angry or rage out. Bury all hatchets.

If you get dragged into court, make friends with the priests who run the court. In fact, try to do that before you arrive in court. Otherwise, they might hand you over to the head priest who works for Rome and he will hand you over to some guard, who will throw you in jail, where they’ll beat and torture you as long as they desire.

You have heard it said, ‘Thou shalt not mess around with someone else’s wife or husband.’ But I tell thee if a man looks at a woman with desire, he’s already committed sin in his heart. It was also said, ‘Any man who divorces his wife must give her a written notice of divorce.’

You have heard that it was said to our people long ago, ‘When thou swearest, it makes the vow stronger. But I tell thee don’t swear. Say only ‘yes’ if you mean ‘yes,’ and only ‘no’ if you mean ‘no.’ If you say more than that, it is from the Evil One.

You have heard it said, ‘An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth.’ But I tell thee, an eye for an eye makes the whole world blind. If anyone sues you in court and tries to take your shirt, give them your coat. And if the police walk you a mile, go two. Refuse nothing.

You have heard it said, ‘Love thy neighbor, hate thine enemy.’ But I tell thee, love thine enemies. Pray for those who treat you badly. The sun rises for all people, good and bad. Rain falls on those who do right and do wrong. If you love only those who love you, why should you get a reward? Even tax collectors can do that.

When you do something good, don’t do it in front of others so that they will see you doing good. If you do that, you will not be rewarded.
When you give to the homeless, don’t announce it. Don’t be like the hypocrites in the temples or on the streets blowing trumpets and arranging big events. They want everyone to praise them. The truth is, that’s all the reward they’ll get. Give quietly when no one is looking.

When you pray, don’t be like the hypocrites that flash their dogma on their sleeve. They want people to see and hear them. The truth is, that’s all the reward they’ll get. Close the door when you pray.

And when you pray, don’t be misguided like the people who don’t know anything about enlightenment. Pray from your heart. Go with the flow.

(Jesus prays)
Blessing be upon the Father and Mother. We pray for peace on earth, same as the peace in heaven. Give us enough bread to survive another day and forgive our sins, as we strive to forgive those who have sinned against us. Don’t tempt us, but keep evil thoughts at bay, and lead us away from temptation.

Don’t flash a lot of bling and don’t buy furs and silk, both can be destroyed by moths or rust. And thieves can break into your house and steal your treasures. Instead, invest in love, something that can’t be destroyed by moths or rust, something thieves can never steal. Make your heart your treasure trove. If you radiate love, you will be full of light.

But if you look at people with an evil eye, you will be full of darkness.

You cannot serve two masters. You will hate one and love the other, or you will be loyal to one and not care about the other. You cannot serve God and worship material things at the same time.

So I tell you, don’t worry about the things that don’t matter. Life is more important than food, drink and clothing, and the body is more important than what you put in it or on it. Look at the birds. They don’t plant, harvest, or harbor food. Life is easier when you go downstream.

Look at the hemp in the field. See how it grows. One day it’s alive and the next day it is harvested. You are faithless if you don’t understand this message.

Don’t worry and say, ‘What will we eat?’ or ‘What will we drink?’ or ‘What will we wear?’ People who are without faith are always worrying.

Don’t be judgmental, allow brothers and sisters some slack.

Why draw attention to some spec in your brother’s eye, when there is a big splinter in your eye? Why say, ‘Let me take that spec out of your eye,’ when you have a bigger splinter in your eye? You are a hypocrite! First, clear your own eye. Then you will be better able to clear someone else’s eye.

(A dog approaches, Jesus pets it.)

Be kinds to your pets. Do not hurt them.

Question authority. Power always corrupts. Investigate and a door will open. Whoever asks will receive. Whoever investigates will find. And whoever continues to knock will have a door opened.

Do any of you have a son? If he asked for bread, would you give him a rock? Or if he asked for a fish, would you give him a snake? Of course not! Do unto others what you would have them to do unto you. This is the meaning of the Law of Moses and the teaching of the prophets.

The road to hell is long and wide, but the correct route is narrow and tricky.

Watch out for false prophets who want to sell the meaning of life. They will come looking like sheep, but are really wolves. You will know them because of the things they do. Good things don’t come from bad people, just as grapes don’t come from thorn bushes, and figs don’t come from thorny weeds. In the same way, good trees produce good fruit, while bad trees produce bad fruit. You will know bad people by their bad deeds.

Some of us will rat out others inside the movement to save themselves. Do not seek vengeance against informers. They are misguided and will get whatever they deserve. Whoever hears these teachings and obeys them is like a wise man who built his house on rock. It rained hard, the floods came, and the winds blew and beat against that house. But it did not fall because it was built on rock. Whoever hears these teachings of mine and does not obey them is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. It rained hard, the floods came, and the winds blew and beat against that house. And it fell with an enormous crash.

Everyone with two good ears, better listen!

The lost Gospel of Thomas

Jesus realized two brothers were following him around.

“What do you want?” he asked.

“Rabbi, where are you staying?”

Come and see,” he said. It was exactly four twenty in the afternoon when they went with him, and received a massive dose of cannabis oil, after which they remained with Jesus for the rest of the day.

Andrew, Simon Peter’s brother, was one of those who’d heard what John said and looked for Jesus. He went to find his brother, Simon, “We have to check out this so-called holy anointing oil that John and his cousin Jesus are saying has been intentionally written out-of-history, although it’s supposed to be the real story behind the burning bush, and if you can believe that, the moon is made of cheese and I got a bridge to sell you in Galilee.”

Then Andrew brought Simon to meet Jesus. Looking intently at Simon, Jesus said, “Your name is Simon, son of John—but you will be called Peter. The next day Jesus decided to go to Galilee. He found Philip and said to him, “Come, follow me.” Philip was from Bethsaida, Andrew and Peter’s hometown.

Philip went to look for Nathanael and told him, “We got this supposedly magic oil from this truther.”

“Truther!!” exclaimed Nathanael. “Can anything good come from a truther?”

“Come and see for yourself,” Philip replied.

As they approached, Jesus said, “Now here is a genuine son of Israel—a man of complete integrity.” “How do you know about me?” Nathanael asked.

Jesus replied, “I could see you under the fig tree before Philip found you.”

Then Nathanael exclaimed, “Rabbi, I like your style!”

Jesus asked him, “Do you like me because I told you I had seen you under the fig tree? You will like much greater things than that after you take a massive hit off this oil and milk mixture. Sit next to the oil lamp while I pour this anointing oil on your head and then tell me if you feel the power of the lord upon you.”

Stories from Mount Khajeh

300px-باران_در_قلعه_رستمWhen constructing the ancient temples, location was everything. You had two basic options: a dominating hill overlooking a town or city, or something in the middle of nowhere with splendid views and great feng shui.
Mt. Khajeh is a black basalt plateau rising up on an island in Lake Hamun like a flat-top mushroom. According to the Zoroastrian religion (which pre-dates Judaism, Islam and Christianity), this lake is the birthplace of the true prophet.
Three hundred years before Christ, this was one of the largest temples in existence, although a string of them stretched from Iraq to India, all dispensing the same sacrament. After arriving by ferry at the dock, one might have been greeted by beggars, musicians and a vibrant trading circle, where spices, foods, fabrics, sigils and icons could be obtained. Some might be exchanging their city outfits for the signature psychedelic tunic tied with a simple rainbow-colored hemp rope.
Om circles would be breaking out in groups along the trail as you approached the temple. The walls and temple towers would have been painted with blazing psychedelic frescos similar to today’s graffit art. “I love you” and “we love you” would be heard wafting up and down the footpath, as well as “welcome home, brother.” People who didn’t know each other would be sharing hugs and gifts. The well-healed visitors would be hiding their gold rings and earrings as these would be a badge of oppression. Expensive sandals would seem gaudy and out-of-place, lost in this barefoot army.
Drums and chanting from inside the temple could be heard from a long way off, but nothing prepared one for the explosion of energy once you passed through the arch and confronted the courtyard filled with musicians, chanters, spinners, dancers and performers. If you were lucky, a gigantic OM circle might break out as you arrived. These were scheduled for regular intervals and signaled by playing a ram’s horn.
Screen Shot 2015-02-10 at 11.58.53 AMEveryone at the temple is stoned and drinking soma, which is hot milk with cannabis and cinnamon. It’s available for free inside the temple, although most people leave a temple donation. Many sick people have come for treatment, and the critically ill have their own rooms next to the temple. There’s a free kitchen that runs on donations that feeds those who work for free in the cannabis fields and end up sleeping in the courtyard. They are temple monks and many work harder than slaves keeping this temple running, and refuse all pay as they consider temple work its own reward.
Over the centuries the rich will get control of this temple, and the psychedelic tunics replaced by black robes and real slaves will return. When this happens, only the rich will be allowed access to soma. And eventually, people will forget about the magic plant. Until someone named Moses comes along and speaks with a burning bush. And then the cycle will repeat itself again across the centuries from Moses to John the Baptist. But no matter how much the rich try to crush it, the truth just keeps coming back.